Some insatiable compulsion drove me ever closer to the brink of insanity; knowing full well that it was not I who controlled my cat, but my cat, who controlled me! As always, I sat in the big, bean bag chair, sweating, waiting for the cat’s pause on the arm of the chair, where I am forced to obey his every command! When was it that I became locked inside my cat? When did I become more him than me?
I remember I had stepped on his tail, and asked him if it hurt… He answered emphatically: ‘MEOW!’ I was stunned that my cat had spoken to me outright, in acknowledgement of his own pain! So I tested him further! I asked: ‘What color are my shoes?’ and he answered: ‘BROWN!’ I was amazed! My cat could talk! Ever since that day: June 3rd. 2013, 8:17 pm., that cat has given me commands, and I have tried to carry them out to the best of my ability; even sometimes going out of my way to bat a big, ball of wool around! At least I know my cat’s happy I’ve found a toy…
As I sat sweating, listening to the deafening rain drops, and squinting at the lightning outside my play house, I wondered, was I in danger? Or was God just taking my picture? God only knows, as I sensed the hellish thing approach me; pussy footing around, sashaying over, taking his sweet time… He gingerly sprang up to the arm of my chair, with the agility of a really fast tree sloth! He gave the command: ‘ROW!’ This means: ‘Scratch my nose!’ And why did I smell like raw fish?
He tilted his head back and moved it from side to side, with his eyes closed, and his mouth slightly open! His purs became unbearably loud! It all became intoxicating! I had to have more! Then one stormy night, a month later, I woke up scratching my nose like crazy! I was becoming more and more like my cat; developing a taste for chicken, tuna, liver, birds, mice, flys and millipedes! It wasn’t long before I was licking myself clean, and craving for Whiskas! Now it feels like I have whiskers all over my cheeks, and antennae over my eyes! God this fur itches! I must look in the mirror… … … ARRRRGGG!!!