Well there goes that idea shot all to Hell! Can’t even leave without someone threatening to, let me get this right: ‘kick my tiny Canadian ass!’ Resorting to blackmail eh? I admire your tact and diplomacy. And I resent being called a Canadian! As for the tiny ass part, guess you’re right; though I do recall our two countries once had a war over Canadian bacon… I think John Candy won. What does that mean???
However, there is a dilemma… By my very nature, I like to be at something until I’ve sucked every possible drop of life-blood out of it! I can multitask, but not when I’m involved with something I love so much as writing! A new rival is on the sidelines waiting though, and she is, every bit as impatient… I wanna learn to do illustrations! This would mean I would be absorbed by the collective; for I am now: ‘Torn between two lovers’ and I can’t be faithful to one, without losing the other! And I was this far [ ] from a clean get-away!
See, I thought I’d let you down gently by calling you a bunch of suckers. That way, you’d just think I turned into an A-Hole, and go on with your lives unscathed. Hang on! There’s more juicy jibberish! By the looks of things, maybe you’re not all a bunch of savages after all! I do recall upon occasion, seeing the odd one or two of you fumbling precariously with a knife and fork; obviously more suited for a pitch fork and switch blade! No matter… You think I’m weird, and I think you require seeing eye dogs to find your like finger, so we’re even; all three of us are square with the house now! LOL!
But wait! There’s more boring, useless CRAP that you must know! I used to love to draw as a kid! I would spend hours coming up with ONE USELESS PIECE OF SCIBBLE AFTER ANOTHER!! Finally, everything clicked, and I made a stick man! Pray to me!! Anyway, it made me feel like a tiny God on the cusp of creation! I was this far [ ] from coming into my own! My own what, I don’t know… But I was coming!!
The problem is, I’m 63 now, and my hands shake from submerging my entire head in beer for half a century :O( Yes! I was a prepubescent alcoholic; I needed beer in my formula, or I couldn’t keep it down… Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder!
Anyway, to get on with my tripe see? I have to take Clanazopam to get rid of my shakes… unfortunately, I have to live with some shaking, or the increased dosage would make my groggy, and I’m afraid I’d just end up with an illustration of me on drugs! At the same time, I don’t wanna abandon my weirdo friends! Weirdness belongs together in a weird sort of way…
I’ve already ordered the best books from: ACME, about illustration and Corel Painter 12, for Christmas. And if the fat, jolly, old Prick is good to me, I’ll get my wish! And for their cold, hard cash, they’re gonna wanna see concrete results!
Anybody got any concrete I can borrow for just a little while? See my problem now? What’s a certified Idiot ta do? Maybe it’s just much ta do about nothing… Maybe I’ll adjust, while I stuff myself with pork sausages? There just doesn’t seem to be enough hours in the day! Did you know there are no more pennies in Canada now? I know! It doesn’t make cents :O)